Why You Should Let Yourself Grieve

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What makes us unique in our world is our range of emotions which we carry around, display and usually hide. As humans, we can feel joy and happiness to a level which we can hardly find in any other creature, while at the same time our spirits can dip to lows that startle us. It is easy to let yourself feel the good, and ignore the bad. However, to be healthy individuals, we must allow ourselves to feel the sad and hurting emotions that well up.

Keep in mind that it may take days, months, perhaps years to truly move on from an emotional event. Do not rush yourself. I want to encourage you, and hopefully remind you that you are always loved and that this world is full of people who want to care for you, even people you may not know exist!

Let Other People In

Many of us may fear finding ourselves alone during bad times, but like other emotions, we tend to hide our fears from others in order to maintain a specific persona. The truth is that many people want nothing more than to be there for others in their times of need. While you may not feel comfortable expressing your feelings to the people in your life, there are other people waiting for you to find them. Whether it is through doctors and therapists specializing in mental health, support groups of individuals with similar experiences, or simply people with open hearts, you can always find people who feel called to help end other’s emotional turmoil.

The healthiest way to let yourself express emotion is with other people. The longer we hide our pain from others, the harder and more painful it can become to move passed it. We may resort to unhealthy ways of coping with our loss, rather than relying on people who will raise us up. Do not let fear stop you from getting the help you need. This world is full of love, and while it may be hard to see, once you start looking you are sure to find it.

Understanding How You Feel

The next best thing you can do for yourself is ensuring that you truly understand how you feel. Writing a journal is probably the best way to do this, as it will allow you the privacy needed to express thoughts that do not always make sense, and allow you to analyze them later. It is important that you do not rely solely on this, but allow it to act as a kind of melting pot of thoughts and experiences as you go through your grieving process. Writing about the advice and comfort you receive, juxtaposed with how you feel can go a long ways towards coming to terms with your emotions.

Understanding The Importance Of Feeling Loss

Your goal is not to forget and leave behind what you feel, but to let the pain heal while allowing the experience to develop who you are as a person. Your life isn’t going to be the same afterwards, but we are all constantly changing, no matter what the case. We do not often think about how the best things in life shape us. But just as finding a spouse, having children, getting a dream job, and any other goal you may have shape you as a person, so the things you lose are going do the same. We do not always get to choose in which direction we will grow, but the important thing is that we do not resist these changes.

Remember that the best thing you can do for yourself is to ensure you are surrounded by people who are ready to listen to you. Humans are sociable beings. It is one of the few instinctual needs we cannot ignore. We must remember that, just as breathing and eating come to us naturally, so does feeling. Emotions are hardwired into our minds, and ignoring them will not bring us solace. Let yourself feel the negative emotions. In time they will pass, and you will come out as a stronger individual.

Caleb DeLaurentis
Love to travel the world, go wilderness camping + fishing, read, write, and play Dungeons and Dragons. Recently graduated with my English degree from the Univerisity of Minnesota. I currently do freelance writing for goals.com, as well as manage a band and produce a podcast.
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